Exploit Every Advantage in Your Wardrobe

Lane Kiffin and LSU made a statement Saturday night, both on the field and on the mic. After a week (or month, or year) of controversy, Kiffin made sure the mic caught him saying, 'Imagine if we had pro players,' as he walked into the tunnel at halftime with his team up 31–3 on the embers of the Clemson dynasty. Regardless of how you feel about LSU's attempt to recruit former pros back to college football (I have many thoughts), one thing is clear about Kiffin: He tries to exhaust every possible avenue for giving himself the best chance to win. He was one of the first coaches to aggressively leverage the transfer portal, his Ole Miss teams briefly became synonymous with players feigning injuries to slow hurry-up offenses, and he's leaned heavily on analytics in game management. If there's a loophole, he'll exploit it. He thrives in the runoff of college football's eroding landscape. While I'd never advise my sons to be more like Lane, I do think his competitive instinct reveals something about how we should use our clothes: We should exploit every advantage they give us. One simple way I've done this since becoming a dad is by using my shirt pockets regularly. They hold snacks, gum, AirPods, and the odd Spider-Man action figure my son begged to bring with us on a walk (which I knew I'd end up carrying within minutes). This should feel obvious, but the Engineered Garments of it all has given pockets a decorative connotation in fashion. Even high-end pocket tees seem designed specifically for Derek Zoolander's flip phone and little else. Beyond practicality, there's a stylistic beauty to leveraging every element of your clothes. Unforced utility is a 'sauce force multiplier' that we unknowingly extol in look books and throwback references. Being disheveled in a way that's decidedlynotcontrived is something we naturally find appealing. It's why Ralph Lauren builds worlds around utility and action. We live behind screens, which only makes that imagery more appealing. So what's our response to this yearning we so obviously share? It's not necessarily that we should garden in our free time or start turning wrenches (but by all means, go off, brother). It's that we should wring out every drop of utility our clothes afford us. Use your pockets, yes, but also use the shape of your clothes to create a more interesting or flattering silhouette. Crease your trousers to create a clean line. Cuff your jeans to show off shoes you love. Leverage fabrics that fit your climate to maximize your personal comfort. Fill your wardrobe with things that make practical sense for your life, then exhaust every avenue for using them fully. This will make you feel ready, practically and stylistically, sure. But the real payoff is that it makes your clothes come to life — or, more appropriately, fills them with the markings of your life. Eventually, your closet becomes the rafters where the game-worn jerseys of your life hang. Whether we acknowledge it or not, that's the kind of nostalgia and evidence of a life well-lived we're longing for. All of that leads me to something I never thought I'd say: I think we should all be a little more like Lane Kiffin. (But only a little.) This Substack is reader-supported. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.