Kashmir's weddings and price of convenience

I attended a wedding a while back. The thing that struck me wasn't the size of the Wazwan. Or the number of guests. It was what was missing. Not a single guest received his drink in a plastic cup. Instead, they were all given drinks in glass bottles. Yes, you read that right. The chutney, curd, and pulao were served in reusable traditional copper utensils. In fact, even the dastarkhan was biodegradable. It felt unusual. And then I realised how unusual the ordinary has become. When I mentioned it to the host, he smiled and said something that stayed with me. 'I am trying my bit not to be party to environmental degradation.' Advertisment This could be a pretty important message. While many large-scale environmental campaigns are necessary, it's possible that smaller-scale actions like this could be much more effective. After all, Kashmiri weddings are no longer just celebrations. They have also become some of our biggest consumption events. Hundreds, sometimes thousands, of people gather at one place. Food is prepared in huge quantities. Water is consumed in bottles. Plates, glasses, spoons, tissues and packaging are often discarded after a few hours. As a result, being convenient has become our standard operating procedure. However, convenience has a price. And we often don't see the price because the waste disappears from our sight once it leaves the wedding venue. There is another curious feature of Kashmiri weddings. Time. The invitation card may say 2 pm. Guests arrive at 2. Some arrive at 2:30. At 3, people start looking at their watches. At 4, someone whispers, 'Tashnaer Thas?' And sometimes the Wazwan finally arrives at 5 or 6—or even later. We have somehow made this acceptable. Showing up late to a wedding has become an expectation. If you do happen to show up on time, you will appear overly enthusiastic. There is another environmental element involved here as well. Once hundreds of guests are forced to spend hours sitting at a wedding site, the area remains operational for longer periods of time. Electricity is used longer (lights remain on) and heating/cooling will continue to run longer. Additionally, traffic will remain congested around the wedding site for longer times. And there is another cost. People who have other commitments lose hours simply waiting. Advertisment Then there are the fireworks and music, sometimes going late into the night. The debate regarding this issue is well-known. 'It is a wedding. You only live once,' blah blah. This may be true. Nevertheless, for someone living next door, it may be the third wedding that week. For an elderly person, a newborn, a patient or a student preparing for an examination, that one night can be very long. Noise pollution is rarely considered pollution in the same way as plastic or smoke. It should be. Celebration does not have to mean maximum volume. Perhaps the most uncomfortable sight comes after the guests leave. The same Wazwan which embodies the spirit of Kashmiri hospitality can sometimes be observed lying in a heap near the dumpster. Rice, meat, salads, desserts. Food that was prepared with care, served with pride and then thrown away. The problem is not Wazwan. The problem is waste. We need to ask ourselves a tough question: Are we preparing food for our guests? Or are we preparing food so that we can display abundance? Traditional Kashmiri celebrations had numerous practices that were inherently less wasteful than those practiced today. Utensils were cleaned and reused. Food was handled differently. Less packaging existed. A greater reliance upon items intended to be used only once did not exist either. Modernization has created some conveniences. On the other hand, modernization has allowed us to dispose of some things, including our dishes. That recent wedding provided a small example of a counterpoint. Nothing revolutionary happened. No lectures on climate change took place. Simply put, a decision to use fewer disposable products was made. Glass cups instead of plastic cups. Reusable utensils instead of throwaway ones. Biodegradable material instead of plastic. Advertisment It made me realize that environmental responsibility does not necessarily require a massive campaign all the time. Sometimes it starts with a host choosing to act differently. Kashmir does not require less celebration; Kashmir requires less wasteful celebration. We can enjoy our Wazwan. Invite our relatives and friends. Celebrate our joy loudly enough to let everyone know how happy we are; but perhaps not loudly enough to disturb an entire neighbourhood. We can create beautiful weddings without creating disposable ones. Next time we attend a wedding, we should look beyond the flowers, lights and Wazwan. We should take note of what remains behind after everyone goes home. That is where the actual cost of our celebration may be waiting.